Moving Out Not On

Jesse, my first born 22 year old son, is moving out of home.

In two weeks.

It’s been talked about now for quite a few months and finally a lovely red brick house not far from our home was found. He is moving in with his gorgeous girlfriend, Emma. I am happy for them both. We all love Emma; our son is a lucky man.

Do I think it’s time for him to make this leap? Definitely.

Do I think he will be happy? Absolutely.

But..

It feels funny. The end of a chapter in my book that I now wish had been read slower. The little boy who found it so hard to say goodbye at the school gate is long gone. Replaced with a young, self-assured man full of confidence and a clear direction of where he wants to go in life.

I know that the quiet house I sometimes crave will now be loud in the silence his absence will bring.

We can drive each other crazy and we argue frequently but I will miss him so much.

I will miss the late night chats we have when we are on our own.

I will miss watching an old episode of Criminal Minds together and enjoying it just as much the second time round.

I will miss hearing the familiar sound of his car pulling up out the front of the house and the involuntary sigh of relief I make upon hearing it.

I will miss watching him kick off his shoes and wave through the door as he arrives home from work.

I will miss the trading of insults with each other that only we think are funny or appropriate.

I will miss my name being yelled out to find” lost” clothing that was never actually missing.

A million little things seemingly unimportant until they are.

I will even miss his protein shakers that multiply in numbers on a regular basis left on the side of the sink……………………….no…………..I actually won’t as that would be ridiculous.

Life moves in stages and his next stage has pushed me into mine. But I know our close relationship will continue to evolve. A lot of the time I am the person who he wants to talk to about things, not the parent he wants advice from. He needs less answers and even less approval for his decisions but instead we now share his experiences and in turn he has become interested in mine. It’s a nice transition.

Someone said to me that you see more of your kids when they leave home so I am hoping that is true.

The other night I said to him, “I’m going to miss you. What will I do?”

Quick as a flash and with his killer smile he replied, “Send food.”